Get advice on how to deal with jerks at work Check out the book 'Jerks At Work' and other titles by Ken Lloyd Ph.D. Return to the homepage Learn more about Ken Lloyd, Ph.D. Submit a question to Ken Lloyd, Ph.D.

You asked, Ken answers ...

This item is filed under these categories:
Workload Work/Life Balance Career Planning Stress

I am a young, salaried professional, and I am concerned about the long hours that I am putting in at work. As demanding as it is, I like my job, but I am stressed out because it is destroying my relationship with my fiancÈ. I want both, but I am thinking that's impossible. What are your thoughts?

You may be able to have both, but unless you take some corrective action now, you may end up with neither. The demands of your job are creating difficulties with the significant other in your personal life, and those difficulties can lead to significant productivity problems at work.

Many upward-striving individuals never tell anyone at work that their job is hurting other commitments in their lives, as they fear being labeled as weak. However, submissiveness is a far greater sign of weakness.

There are companies that understand this type of situation and have implemented work/life programs that seriously support and encourage employees to put some balance in their lives. These companies have flexibility in terms of their hours, support for family-friendly policies, travel benefits for partners/spouses, and the like. Although they may implement these kinds of programs because they are caring employers, they also recognize that there are costly outcomes when employees fall into the stress cycle that you have entered.

It is time for you to honestly assess the priorities in your life and consider discussing your concerns with management. The discussion should include some suggestions regarding the ways to introduce more work/life balance, and the benefits associated with doing so. If you are subsequently labeled as a weak employee, then you are in a weak organization.

Comment on this item

Your name (optional)
If you leave this blank, we'll list you as "Website visitor"

Your comments
Please keep your comments focused on the topic. Thanks!