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Meetings Insults Power Plays and Players Blaming

At the end of a recent meeting, one of my co-workers blurted out that I have not been very effective in carrying out my responsibilities, so her work has suffered. I was caught totally off guard, and then the meeting ended. I spoke with our manager afterwards, but I don't think I had much of an impact. By the way, the employee later apologized for stabbing me in the back. What should I do now?

Just as most sporting events cannot end with a penalty, a meeting should not end with an attack. Whoever was running the meeting should have called an audible and kept the meeting going until the matter was resolved.

Your attacker was very clever. She waited until the end of the meeting, and this allowed her destructive comments to be the final thought that the attendees took with them. She scored all of her points, and you scored none. Although you spoke with your manager afterwards, and this was the right thing to do, you already know that the impact was not great.

At this point, you should keep your guard up, make sure your manager and other co-workers are aware of your effectiveness on the job, and give your manager more specific updates on your work.

By the way, the attacker's apology to you was meaningless. Apologizing for stabbing someone in the back does not make the wound disappear. If your co-worker wants to start the healing process, tell her to voice her apology to your manager and to your co-workers who attended the meeting.

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