|Company policy is not a menu where managers get to pick and choose the items they like, while force-feeding all of the policies to everyone else. |
The behavior of your manager sends several problematic messages. The first is that if one policy can be ignored, the rest can be treated similarly. Your manager's actions can easily open the door to claims of unfair treatment and even discrimination.
And further, your manager delivered a harsh and subtly threatening message when she essentially advised you to mind your own business. This type of treatment is often part of a broader pattern of questionable managerial behavior that targets many employees.
The best step is to speak with her manager. However, depending upon your relationship with this individual and history in the company, your comments might not be given full weight. In addition, your manager may try to single you out later. You should consider having some of your fellow employees join you in this meeting. By doing so, you can raise your credibility and reduce the potential for reprisals.
When managers ignore policies and tell their employees to mind their own business, someone at a more senior level is likely to mind.